German

German is an unattractive language. Mind you, I love and appreciate Germany, but like many others, do not find the language the least bit attractive. It's what I refer to as one of the "hairball" languages, of which there are many....including the language of my Scottish ancesters, Gaelic. The hairball reference is to the many linguistic sounds in German which replicate the unfortunate noise a cat makes when he's about to hornk up a big hairball, or in the case of a person, a big, green "loogie."

There is an agency in town which sells trips in hot air ballons called Balloon Fahrten, pronounced "balloon fartin'." Now in my mind balloon fartin' is what my boys used to do when they blew up balloons, and rather than tie off the end, they would hold it tightly with the thumb and index finger of each hand, pulling their fingers in opposite directions to let a tiny bit of air escape with a loud, flatulent sound.

A klinger is a door bell, and a nutzername is a username. The hideous word ausfahrt means "exit" and geöffnet ( ge-ERF-net) means open. I could go on ad naseum, but I think you get the idea.

On a well traveled corner in town, there is a living statue. He is young and wears gold colored overalls, a pointy hat, and holds a gold rake. He paints his face, hands, and bare feet gold, and stands upon a small curving stone at a busy intersection where he's sure to get lots of attention. I walk past that corner on my way to and from the apartment and used to walk right beneath him, until a flurry of giggles from his rapt audience told me that he's doing something with the rake over my head each time I pass. I now cross the street and make a wide berth around him so as not to be an unwary part of his act. Each time I see him I am reminded of the movie Hot Fuzz, where a small town in England is overly concerned about the arrival of a living statue because they feel it detracts from their hard earned designation as the most beautiful town in England. The movie is a hoot and full of wry British humor if you've not seen it.

I recently observed a trio of boys aged 11 or 12, who were watching the living statue. They desperately wanted to take a picture, but were too shy. "Take a picture", one told the other. "I will if you do", countered the second. The third boy said, "Let's go look at the tower." "Which one? They're EVERYWHERE!", replied one of the other boys, the wonder and excitement in his voice palpable. Rothenburg has the ability to bewitch even the young.

When I lived in Crailsheim, I taught at the Department of Defense Dependent school located across the street from our apartment. One year I brought my class of learning impaired students, ages 5-12, on a field trip to Rothenburg. They, too, were bewitched, loving the Kriminal Museum, enjoying a walk atop the wall circling much of the city, and visiting the world famous Christmas store. Rothenburg has soemthing for most everyone. How lucky I am to be here again!