The Joy of Friends

I am so lucky to have met some wonderful people on this journey and, particularly, here in Cortona. A friend told me, not long ago, about an incident I had long since forgotten. Apparently we were talking about family and friends and the importance of each in one’s life. This particular friend is not especially close to her family emotionally, has not married, and although she truly wanted children, her destiny has not afforded her that opportunity. She depends greatly on the close friends that she has and during a discussion I, who was lucky enough to have a husband and children of my own at the time, told her that friends are fine, but it’s FAMILY that really stands by you in times of need and it’s family who will be there walking us through the shadows as this physical life ebbs and comes to its conclusion. She told me recently how much pain my comment has caused her. It must have seemed as if I was flinging my good fortune at having children in her face. To say I felt, and still feel, terrible would be an understatement. That I could be so arrogant about my fortune in telling her that friendships are secondary to family relationships still floors me.

What’s more, over the past 5-10 years my opinion of the role of the various relationships in our lives has been completely altered. Families are incredibly wonderful and I consider myself lucky to have both of my parents in my life and to have been gifted with two sons. However, I now realize that having a blood family does not necessarily mean that those family ties are strong, close, and emotionally nurturing. Relationships are complicated and come with no guarantees. As I have matured, the value I place on my few friendships has increased tenfold. There is something so fundamentally different about family, who may well be in one’s life out of guilt or duty, and friends, who share your life because they want to. A lucky few have loving relationships with both family and friends.

On that note, my new friends, Barbara and Carol and I took the bus to Arezzo on Tuesday and walked a mile to pick up the rental car, a slightly dinged up, silver Fiat Punto, my rental car of choice in Italy. Barbara elected to sit in back where she caught up on some much needed rest while Carol and I chatted our way to San Gimignano. The heavy mist and fog cast each small town in a shroud of mystery. The leaves on the trees and the grape vines, now stripped of their precious bunches of sweet grapes, are turning gentle shades of yellow and orange.

Upon reaching San Gimignano, we dropped Barbara at the front gate to save her the walk up from the parking lot, and Carol and I parked the car and walked up to meet Barbara. Along the way we walked past a stone wall and under an arch covered in vines, whose leaves had turned the most beautiful shade of rich, pink-red, accented with tiny, blue berries. We stopped to take pictures, which I posted on the Blog earlier this week. We each wandered the town doing a bit of shopping and taking pictures. Carol absolutely loved the town and was very glad we’d come. We took a leisurely lunch at La Stella, The Star, and we shared an appetizer of prosciutto, salami, and Pane Toscano then main dishes of pasta. We had a long conversation about our Spiritual beliefs and past readings we have received from Intuitives. Carol is also intuitive and told me she saw a “big diamond” in my future along with a really nice man, who is possibly an attorney. I guess time will tell.

We had a drink at an outdoor café, eiscafe’ for me, and drove back to Cortona where Carol and I tried to figure out the whole gas pumping self-serve mystery. The hardest part for me was putting the gas cap back in and, finally, Carol took over and completed the task as I was obviously unable. What a nice day with friends!